I know you are disappointed. I know that you want me to continue my job in St. Luke's but I choose not to. I decided to quit and to try another job. There many reasons why I came up with this decision.

1. I am so exhausted. - I am exhausted physically. The work is taking its toll on me. I have to do overtimes several times a month 7-8 days the most, is that even legal? I am exhausted emotionally. Working with difficult people is harder than I even thought. Having yoir workmates bully you every single day has been my dilemma for the past 11 months and I tried so hard to stay in this job even if I've wanted to quit ever since. I am exhausted mentally. In other jobs you get to leave the workload behind when you go home but in mine you dont. You take it everywhere you go and I can no longer do that anymore.

2. I lost myself in SLMC. - I was so sure I knew who I am before I entered SLMC. I was a happy girl. I find beauty and happiness in everything but now not anymore.

3. I want to have another profession. One that is far too far from Nursing. - Not because I dont like my profession anymore but because I believe I would do beter in another job.

4. I want to be happy again. - I do not want to be this hollow and empty again. I dont want to work in a job that is dragging. I want a job that I enjoy. I want a job that I like.

For what its worth, I want you to know that I am so sorry if I disappointed you. I want you to know that I wanted to continue my job in SLMC just as much as you do but my heart is telling me that if I do not turn my back now there will come one day that I will not even know myself anymore. I work to live and not I live to work. I know that no matter how many times you tell me you understand I know that you really dont. I am not asking you to because I know its not understandable anyway. But I need this. I dont want to do anything I might regret when I grow old. If my decision of leaving SLMC is wrong then I will learn if it is right then the odds are in my favor both ways I know it will help me grow. I will make you proud. I promise.